Keep on brackin' in BB's world

CLEVELAND -- They say the heart of rock-n-roll is in Cleveland. "And from what've seen," our resident expert said, "I believe them!"

Yes, this was a rare mid-Final Four trip for our traveling bracketologist, but he had a two-fold mission:

1. Cover the women's Final Four for the first time.

2. Escape the football-loving fans in Atlanta.

Seriously, what is the deal with these people? Ohio State vs. Florida might give us a national championship game pitting the two best teams in the country, but you get the nagging sense that fans from both places would rather be somewhere else ... like spring football practice.

The Florida fans were actually chanting "Let's Play Football!" at the Ohio State supporters. Of course, the last two times these teams played on a big stage, it was in the BCS Championship Game in Arizona, and it was Florida - the heavy underdogs - drubbing the Buckeyes for the title.

So BB touched down in Ohio yesterday afternoon, looking out the window to the plane and musing, "Hmm ... I didn't know Cleveland was on the ocean. I wonder if I can pick up a pair of those thick-rimmed Drew Carey glasses. Bracket Girl says I need a new look, and you saw how much she hated the beard ..."

Before heading to Quicken Loans Arena, he decided to make a stop in the Rock-n-Roll Museum. BB loves all the arena classics, and while he was disappointed to find that Gary Glitter had yet to be enshrined, plenty of the artists were recognized for their work.

"Van Halen made it in for -Jump', of course," our man said. "The Ramones for -Blitzkrieg Bop' and Queen for -We Will Rock You'. And, of course, James Brown for -I Got You (I Feel Good)'. Funny, I didn't see Rednex honored for their classic -Cotton-Eyed Joe' ..."

But this was a business trip, and the only reason his bosses would ever let him out of the secret lab is basketball. BB had to come here to see the best story in college basketball, men's or women's, in person.

"And wow," he said, "did the Rutgers women put on a show."

This was as thorough a butt-kicking as there has been in years in a Final Four game. Rutgers had at least a 10-point lead for nearly the whole game, shooting 3-pointers like pros. But what impressed our expert the most: the defense.

LSU center Sylvia Fowles, a 6-6 All-American, had no chance against the swarming Rutgers defense. "If Greg Schiano decides to hire a defensive coordinator," BB said, "I nominate C. Vivian Stringer."

And now, the Scarlet Knights will be on the court for the final college basketball game of the season, a chance to clip the nets and make history. "Guess I'm coming back to Cleveland," Bracket Boy said. "Maybe this time I can talk to the people at the Rock -n' Roll Hall of Fame about that Gary Glitter exhibit ..."

READER MAIL

His Carnac impersonation continues to inspire ... mail. "Dear Bracket Breath," writes BILLY V. from Chester. "Time for a little Bracket Jeopardy. The Final Bracket Jeopardy Category is Bracket Carnacology. Answer: A Gloater and a Goober. Correct Question: Who are Bracket Boy and Billy Packer?"

Bracket Boy responds: "May you spend a week as Coach's handkerchief the next time he has a head cold."

And BB has gotten a few of these from people hoping their bracket success will line their pockets. "How do we find the results for Bracket Bucks?" one angry reader asked. "Are there any or was this another one of Bracket Boy's scams? Be fair to your fans and bracket following!"

Bracket Boy responds: "People, relax. The results will be in the newspaper on Thursday! I have not embezzled the money. That new hot tub I'm putting in the secret lab? I hung out with Gov. Corzine in Cleveland ..."